Friday, September 17, 2010

Moments with Joey – Kissing Boys


SCENE 1, INTERIOR. LATE AFTERNOON, CLASSROOM. The teacher is working with a fifth-grade boy on an assignment he’d been having difficulty with. As the teacher helps with a few of the math problems, the boy is humming popular tunes from the radio. After a few moments, the boy starts to understand the assignment and the teacher moves across the room to take down the previous week’s vocabulary posters. For several moments there is silence; then, from across the room, the boy breaks into song at the top of his lungs.

JOEY: ♪ I kissed a boy and I liked it…♫♪ the taste of his cherry chap stick ♪…

TEACHER: Joey, that’s probably not the most appropriate song to be singing. Besides, the lyrics go: “I kissed a girl and I liked it.”

[The boy looks up from his Math assignment and grins].

JOEY: I know that, Mr. Z. But if I sang it the other way then it just wouldn’t have been nearly as funny…

[The teacher stands in silence for a beat and then returns to changing the posters and the boy returns to his assignment].

TEACHER: Sometimes you worry me, Joey.

JOEY: Yeah I know; that's what my mom says, too.

[Fade to black].
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23 comments:

  1. Natasha and JesseSeptember 18, 2010 at 12:05 AM

    Hahaha, Joey is the best!

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  2. LSeptember 18, 2010 at 1:13 AM

    Amazing. Your year sounds like it is off to a great start.

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  3. mywestSeptember 18, 2010 at 2:18 AM

    I'm glad you have these moments with Joey....makes each day a new adventure.

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  4. mamahasspokenSeptember 18, 2010 at 6:19 AM

    Sitting here shaking my head because Joey has no idea what he is singing. Give him a few years and then ask him about this, I'll bet you'll see the redest checks ever.

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  5. AnonymousSeptember 18, 2010 at 6:19 AM

    I love their perspective...sometimes.

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  6. MarnieSeptember 18, 2010 at 6:28 AM

    I like Joey.

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  7. Kalei's Best FriendSeptember 18, 2010 at 7:11 AM

    LOL, I feel for you teachers.. I've worked in the classroom and have either heard the teacher or even have been lucky enough to have a student like joey talk to me in that same situation... Kids keep us thinking huh?

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  8. Kristina P.September 18, 2010 at 8:09 AM

    At least he'sw comfortable with his sexuality!

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  9. TeachinfourthSeptember 18, 2010 at 8:17 AM

    K - I am about 98.7% positive that the update in lyrics were for the HP* factor.



    *humor potential

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  10. tammySeptember 18, 2010 at 11:23 AM

    "Yeah I know; that's what my mom says, too."

    Gotta love him.

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  11. mintifreshSeptember 18, 2010 at 12:26 PM

    A boy that understands the 'humor potential' in 5th grade is a comedic genius in the making!

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  12. UnknownSeptember 18, 2010 at 3:28 PM

    "Mintifresh" is correct. He's also in for a looooong haul to graduation. I know. I'm raising my own "Joey". He started High School this year, and we light a candle every day as an offering to the Gods of Not Getting Suspended.

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  13. AnonymousSeptember 18, 2010 at 4:58 PM

    hee hee! So glad you're posting! This boy seemed to get the idea that the song is about kissing one of the same sex as the vocalist, too. Sharp one, that boy.

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  14. Jason, as himselfSeptember 18, 2010 at 5:36 PM

    Oh, boy.

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  15. AnonymousSeptember 19, 2010 at 9:22 AM

    Maybe it's a "Mom of Joey" thing, because when I tell mine the same thing, he just giggles really hard and then nods in agreement.

    But I'm sure I do things that make him wonder, too.

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  16. ShannonSeptember 19, 2010 at 9:15 PM

    I kissed a cupcake and I liked it :-).

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  17. NuttleySeptember 19, 2010 at 10:27 PM

    I love that he performs for you; both in singing (not necessarily that song) and ramping up the HP.

    This Joey's going to be an interesting one...

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  18. MikkiSeptember 19, 2010 at 11:51 PM

    Oh goodness. This one has really left me with the biggest grin. Joey is awesome!

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  19. Mindee@ourfrontdoorSeptember 20, 2010 at 8:12 AM

    Oh my goodness. He is worrying ME. It takes a Joey to take an already inappropriate song and make it worse.

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  20. mCatSeptember 20, 2010 at 4:51 PM

    I can't wait for parent teacher conference and to hear all about Joey's mom. She has got to be a funny lady herself

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  21. DanielleSeptember 21, 2010 at 9:34 AM

    Hilarious! Gotta love having a "Joey" every year! ;)

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  22. CharlotteSeptember 23, 2010 at 2:38 PM

    My 5 year old son sings it that same way. It never occurred to me he would do it at school, too! Thanks for that nightmare tonight, maybe I should prophylacticly email his teacher. ;)

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  23. CBSeptember 23, 2010 at 10:26 PM

    Hilarious! I can totally picture that conversation :-D

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