Sunday, August 11, 2013

A Message from Jason's Dad

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Please listen to this song by Jason Crabb titled “Somebody Like Me“ and you will have a little understanding of what was going on in Jason’s head as he rode away from Provo, Utah a year ago.






Conversations with Jason

I feel like the person in this song…feeling like I have no hope. The news media has totally destroyed my life, my teaching career has ended , my integrity and honor gone. I’m guilty in the eyes of the world without even a trial. I guess I will know who my true friends are because everyone else will not be around.


This is how Jason felt when he rode away from Utah with his Dad and Mother Patsy just a little over a year ago. We only wished he understood the hundreds of family members and friends that believed in him and loved him and would never forsake him.

It has been a hard year dealing with the lost of a son; closing his estate and working with attorneys, but its finally ending. The Provo Police department has returned all of Jason’s personal items that were taken during the investigation and no incriminating evidence was found that could have convicted him of anything. Even with the many interviews conducted with former students and families nothing was found to convict or darken his name.

Jason told us that he was thankful that there were agents that protected children and watched out for their best interests. He only wished that when a teacher was being investigated, that teacher would not automatically lose his or her job. Jason had told us several times he did not hold anyone from the school district to blame and talked about the good times he had working at Amelia Earhart and all the good friends he had.

Anyone who knew Jason understood how important teaching was to him; standing up for the underdog and watching out for those who bullied. Sometimes it was very difficult with his migraines and the depression to get through the day, but all it took was for a old student to walk into his room and say, "Hi Mr. Z, do you remember me?"  Many of these old students would tell him how thankful they were to him for not giving up on them. These words would energize and lift Jason, help him with his depression and give him the encouragement to keep going forward.

Jason would want you to all to know that he is still teaching; just in a new place and he will see everyone again someday.

Please finish this by listening to “Walk on Water“, a song Jason just loved! One does not have to be perfect... just keep doing your best.






Please feel free to respond and let Jason and his parents know what his friends thought of him.

23 comments:

Danielle Dammann said...

Thanks so much for posting this! I've been thinking of Jason all this last week, still not believing he's gone. Love and miss him so much. He taught so much to everyone who knew him. So glad I was able to reconnect with him and Shawna 5 years ago after so long! I know he's up there watching down on us with all the love and concern he expressed when he was with us. Forever in our hearts!!! Love you so much, cuz! I know I'll see you again. Xoxo

Mindy said...

Thank you so much for this. The songs were beautiful, touching, and the perfect bookends to this post.
---------------------------------

To Jason's family -

Jason was and is so very loved and missed. I wish he had been able to feel how much support he had from those who knew and cared for him, that he would have been able to see the positive and lasting impact he had on the lives of so many. I can honestly say without reservation that my life was changed forever and for the better by having Jason in it.

---------------------------------
To Jason -

I miss you every day. This year hasn't been the same without you here. You made me better, braver, more confident, more compassionate, more understanding. I wish I'd told you that, my friend. I wish you had known. I hope you know now.

Save me a place, my friend.

Kalei's Best Friend said...

I for one, and I am sure many of us who followed Jason's blog, did not know the heartache he went through.. What I do know of Jason was his love for teaching.. I live in California and I could kick myself for not meeting up w/him when he made a visit to my state... Anyway, whenever there was an article on education or something that went on in the school I worked at I would discuss w/him.. As far as the song that is posted, I can understand the desperation and aloneness he may have felt.. I do know school districts are very political which is one of the reasons I am no longer w/them... I think of Jason a lot whenever I look at the photo he sent me.. He will always be a creative, loving, dedicated and selfless person in my heart... I certainly can understand the pain his family has gone through.. I too went through it when my husband was killed.. dealing with lawyers, a stubborn corporation to this day has not done a thing to right their wrong.. I will always remember the good- because that is all I ever knew of Jason. ((HUGS))

Michelle Williams said...

Thank you for sharing this! The world and the teaching profession was a better place with Jason in it. He is missed and loved. My heart breaks knowing that Jason was in so much pain and that we lost touch all those years ago. Prayers continue for Jason's family, friends, and students.

Kara said...

I miss Jason. He was a good friend many a time I needed one. He was a good friend to our family. And I was grateful for the opportunity to get to know his family as well. Thank you for this message. It cannot be said in words how he touched our lives. But it is in my heart and I know he can feel that love and gratitude now.

Marc said...

Reading about his last thoughts and feelings breaks my heart. I tried desperately to speak to him those last few days. I knew something was wrong and I wish he would have let me in. He is missed on a daily basis.

Josh said...

Thank you for sharing with us. Jason literally saved my life and my relationship with my own father. I am eternally grateful for what he did. I love him so much and miss him everyday. Jason I am sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed it. I can't wait to see you face to face again. I love you bro.

joan said...

I still think about Jason a lot. I remember, and treasure, the comments on my blog and the emails he sent me. I remember the words of encouragement and I still use the music he sent me in my classroom. I think if them as "Jason songs" and smile when I hear them.

Cari said...

Thank you for raising such an incredible son! He will forever and always hold a special place in my heart. I miss him so much! As I walk the halls of Amelia Earhart daily, I can picture him walking those same halls, constantly being stopped by both students and teachers--always taking time for everyone and always having a smile and something witty to say. I often hear students still talk of him. Even though they weren't old enough to be in his class, they remember when he did morning announcements or when he'd joke around with them in the hall. He truly was loved by all! I hope he knew that. And I hope he knows he's still loved by all and he will never be forgotten.

Jane Merritt said...

'...you knew that with a little love it would make a difference.We need to do the same with people around us. That doesn't mean we should do what they are doing and it doesn't mean that the bad things they do are okay, but we need to be patient with them. You never know when someone will suddenly feel that they want to change and be a better person. As a teacher I try to see the best in the kids who come into my classroom each year but at times it gets hard...you wonder just what will happen to some of the students who are making the bad choices and can only hope for the best...The good part is knowing that you tried and now the rest is up to them. You know, someone may forget what you told them, but they will always remember how you treated them and how they felt around you.'

This is directly from an email I received from Jason Zimmerman in 2005. He always new how to comfort me when I was unsure and worried. I miss him with all my heart and still think about him everyday. Like Jason said, someone may forget what you told them but they will always remember how you treated them and how they felt around you. I will never forget the influence and love I felt from the greatest teacher and friend. Not only was I inspired to be a photographer like him but I have also been motivated to be a good person. I believed in him, loved him and I know he knows that.

Sarah Walles said...

Thank you so much for sharing. Jason was an amazing man and I owe him so much. He literally saved my life and my relationship with my own father. I love and miss him everyday. Jason I am sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed it. I can't wait til I get to see you face to face again. I love you bro.

A Lark said...

Thank you for your post. My thoughts and prayers are with your family. Today is definitely a marker of the grief of a year. A year ago my heart was broken and my life was turned upside down and inside out. I miss Jason every single day. He was my best friend, I loved him, and his parting left a huge hole in my life. But he is with me still from time to time. I am who I am in large part because of his influence on my life. I will never again assume that I have more time with someone - I will always try to treasure every moment with my loved ones.

Car said...

I'm heartbroken to learn of Jason's death. I'll share my story of why I became a reader in hopes that it will bring comfort to his close friends and family. I'm sure they already know how amazing he was, but each story is another life he positively influenced, another branch of him that has rippled through the world and lives on.

I came to his blog quite by chance. Stumbleupon to be exact. I had roamed many a blog,but there was something about this blog that made me stop and read. And read. And read. I stayed up for hours reading hilarious Joey antics, posts about teaching with compassion and purpose, posts with striking pictures and thoughtful insights. I would continue to come back periodically and binge-read to see what Jason was up to. Coming here fueled my motivation to go out in the world and do good. It is rare to find a person who can so vastly change the perspectives of so many people to show that despite the heartaches of life, the disappointments, the struggles, that it is the people in our lives who make life good. Jason's legacy is a bright thread in the fabric of humanity that is woven in to the lives of those who have been forever changed because they were lucky enough to be a part of his life. I'll hold tight to that brightness and goodness that Jason left with me and make sure to pass it on to others.

Karen M. Peterson said...

Thank you so much for sharing this. I think about Jason every day and still miss him so much. I can't imagine how hard it has been for all of you. But know there were plenty of people who would have stood by Jason through anything and everything. He is a good man. And he is still loved.

Rachel said...

This week has been hard leading up to today. My thoughts and feelings are too personal to express here but I wanted Jason's family to know that he is so loved and missed.....

Looking back almost daily I have wished so badly that Jason had known how loved he is and how terribly missed he'd be. His spot at our family events, empty. His chair, his time, his music, his presence..... oh what a hole you've left........

Love,
The Rubow Family

Tamy Mahoney said...

There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of Jason. My questions of "Why?" scream out - not to him but to law and news agencies that are quick to destroy and slow to retract and rebuild. As in the first moments, my heart goes his family, who he loved very much. Thank you for having the courage to post your thoughts. He felt everything so deeply and lived his life with that mantra. I have spend many life altering moments with Jason. His was always the last face I saw as I went off on my many adventures. And his voice was always the reassurance to remind me of my greatness as a daughter of God. It seemed I had to say goodbye far too often - once again I make the promise I made so often - no matter where we are carried, our friendship remains true. You are right here with me Jason - and I'm right there with you. - Love Forever - Tamy Mahoney

emilyaearl said...

It is serendipitous that you shared this as I thought of Jason today before I stood up to teach a group of children. I thought, "I need to captivate these kids like Jason could; to catch their attention. He was so good at that."
I taught with Jason for three years at Amelia. Since his death I have often regretted I didn't have the chance to tell him that I would have believed him. That accusations true or not, it would never change my mind about his goodness.
What I admired most about Jason as a teacher was his ability to make each child feel like a million bucks. No matter his mood, or how he felt, his teacher persona was flawless to his students.
My prayers and thoughts are with Jason and your family.
God Bless.
-Emily Earl

Karen Hill said...

Thank you so much for clearing out the investigation on Jason. I did not know him personally but know several of his friends who verify he was a man of integrity. His assassination by the local press and community gossip was most disturbing.

Miles Moore said...

I know how it is to deal with depression and how dark things can feel. What I have learned about Jason even though I never knew him personally was that he was man of integrity and very caring. I can't imagine what he went through related to the allegations but I wish he were still here. Your right he is teaching on the other side and is now very happy.

imbeingheldhostage said...

It's so heartbreaking. I only knew him through blogging, but his love for teaching was evident. It's such a tragedy. My deepest sympathies go out to you all.

Valerie said...

My husband was one of Jason's roommates and I always admired him. I remember a fantastic gospel doctrine lesson he gave once and was so inspired by his blog. He was always uplifting everyone, and made my day with his compliments and kindness. Even though I wasn't a close friend, I was devastated by his death and the allegations against him. I know someone else who underwent a similar process through police investigation of child pornograpy and suffered innocently from false prosecution. I wish Jason could have know that he was not alone in this. I also wish Jason could have known that he was loved and believed in, and that even had allegations been true, his friends would yet uphold and love him.
Thank you for clearing his name. Looking forward to some more great gospel doctrine lessons from Jason in the life to come.

Mrs M. said...

I don't know why I happened to think of Jason today, but was shocked to learn of our loss to the teaching profession. I sat next to Jason on a bus ride during our trip to LA to receive the Milken Educator Award. During such a short time, his enthusiasm and passion were evident. His dynamic personality must have been such a draw to his students. I am so saddened to learn of his death.

Trevor said...

Thank you for sharing and updating! Hope only the best for you as Jason's family and look forward to seeing Jason at an unknown time in the future!

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