I Want an Alien for Christmas

Pin It It was a little over a week in the planning.

My team and I had to come up with something for our school Christmas sing-in, which we’d perform on the last day before the kids were to leave on break.

I’d jokingly thrown out, “I Farted on Santa’s Lap” as a possibility for the past three years in a row, but it’d never been considered with the least bit of enthusiasm or possibility of happening from my team…

…and this year was no exception.

However, I guess this was understandable coming an elementary school environment; you just know that you’d get a plethora of shocked intakes of breath from parents, copious giggles from children, and you’d hear the song caroled down the hallways and in the lunchroom for months to come.

It would give ‘deck the halls’ an entirely new meaning. Yeah, in other words the entire staff’d hate me.

Still, it’s fun to throw out the idea for the song every year, just to watch it crash and burn in a fiery inferno.

Yet even with this particular song being off the table, the fifth grade team has always managed to dredge up something that totally rocks…after all, my team and I are all about awesome and substandard just won’t do. Yeah, being a perfectionist with narcissistic tendencies is always a huge asset in regards to this.

It was about two weeks ago that we sat in our weekly meeting and kicked around ideas for this year’s performance. After all, our debut of “The Santa Claus Rock” last year would be pretty hard to beat.

After a few minutes I said, “Hey guys, I’ve got the perfect song for this year.”

My team waited for the usual proposal. I made it, it was shot down, and then threw out my real idea.

They loved it; it was so astonishingly overwhelming that they just couldn’t say no.

I came home and scoured the information superhighway in search of a karaoke version of this particular little tune, only to learn that one didn’t exist.

Curses.

Being resourceful, I pulled out my guitar, I looked up the chords online, and three practices with the students later, we were standing in front of the rest of the school ready to blow them away with our high school musical-ish performance.

Granted, in retrospect I wish that the gym hadn’t been quite so big…the roof-shaking rocking we’d performed in the classroom just wasn’t quite as strong as it had been in that vast space.

But still we were awesome.

Without further ado, I present the fifth grade in their entire splendor and glory…yours truly on lead (and only) guitar.




But now I’ve already begun to think about possibilities for next year’s presentation, mostly because I realized somewhere along the way that we’ve again set the standard for coming up with something amazing, and besides, I have to beat out my first grade teacher friend, Abe Yospe, when it comes to performance awesomeness.

...and he can be a tough act to follow.