Wednesday, April 30, 2008

You've got readers

Pin It “I like to start my notes to you as if we're already in the middle of a conversation. I pretend that we're the oldest and dearest friends — as opposed to what we actually are, people who [probably] don't know each other's names and met [through blogging which be both claimed we’d never done] before.”

I love “You’ve got Mail.”

This is an entertaining movie...which I’ve watched numerous times. Tonight, a friend of mine and I were chatting online, and I began to wonder about those out there who come to this blog on a regular basis…some of you who leave comments, and others who do not. Some of you I’ve met, while others remain safely anonymous.

You clearly have me at a disadvantage.

In fact, yesterday I encountered someone who began to talk to me about a few items which I knew we hadn’t discussed before. I was a bit taken aback and began to go through this mental process…trying to figure out just how this person knew all of these elaborate details about events in my life. Finally, I found myself defeated and had to inquire, “Look, how do you know this about me? After all, I’m pretty sure that we’ve never told you about these things.”

To this the person replied, “I read your blog.”

Very powerful words.

Do you realize just what that statement means? I do. I, in essence, was being told that my blog, my site, my random thoughts and what-nots, were worth the contemplation and time of another. In other words, I was readworthy.

I do not take this lightly. In fact, I found myself flattered that someone else takes the time to read my words on a regular basis…kind of like those junkies who TIVO episodes of American Idol or LOST.

So, then comes the question…why? Would I read my blog if I were somebody else? Interesting…very interesting.

I guess I don’t really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void. So goodnight, dear void.

(Just as a side note, there are several references and lines from You’ve Got Mail contained in this post. Let it be known that no copyright, fraud, or plagiarism was intended…thanks for not suing me Nora).

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

The silence

Pin It The screen was before me; it was blank.

I rested my fingertips on the keyboard, like a masterful pianist awaiting inspiration. I closed my eyes and listened for the muses to whisper into my eagerly awaiting ears…listening for the songs of things so sweet their words had yet never been uttered before.

There came nothing.

The keyboard was abandoned, a fruit shake was created, and email was checked. Yet soon again, the blinding expanse of whiteness lay before me. Like a traveler through a white winter storm, I sought solace in my destination…the bottom of the page. Would I reach it this evening?

Probably not…the muses are strangely silent tonight.

Let them sleep, thought I. And I will follow suit.

And it’s only 9:15.

Monday, April 28, 2008

When a site dies

Pin It Webpages have been around for years now. It’s hard to imagine our lives without our favorites…some of these are pages are sites like: YouTube, Making Fiends, absolutely amazing photography sites, or even Blogger. Many of these have become cherished friends—or archenemies—dependant upon the amounts of time we spend in their presence.

I have a web friend.

I’ve blogged about my friend before. That was the time it was taken from the web and looked something like this:

I’ve had my site for two years now…two long years. It’s come a long way too. There have been a few different versions, and these have all been works in progress. However, today I had a student come to me and say, “Mr. Z, the website doesn’t work anymore and I really needed it this weekend.”

It doesn’t work?

After a bit of investigative research I came to discover that my site, classroomofchaos, had finally run its course and expired. Removed from the web, it was joining many of it’s kind in website heaven—or in…well, never mind.

I thought about renewing the site and I even made a call to the company running the server. Excuse me? How much was that going to be? On second thought, perhaps it would be better to simply let it go, and save my pocketbook a three-digit sum (not including the decimal).

I sat at my computer several times at work today and hit the “home” button. It took me to a page to which I was unfamiliar. A page without my helpful links and fun banners (which, consequently, was much more fun previous to the site’s overhaul…however, that would be a blog for another day).

Site thenner:

Site then:

Site now:

I tried to remember the sites contained on my website.

Curses! There were far too many links I had bookmarked on it…but that much? Was it even worth it?

I would think about it.

Well, did I really need a website? After a lot of the most recent changes were made it became only half the site it once was. Did anyone ever use the thing anyway? When was the last time I’d updated the thing anyhow? Besides, what kind of name is Classroom of Chaos in any case?

I shut down the computer.

I told myself that being webless was a blessing. No longer would updating the thing play a part in my timelife!

I was free.

Or so I was…before a three-digit sum.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Why I haven’t written a blog today?

Pin It Good question, I am glad you asked...To answer this as briefly as possible, let me just say that I’ve spent numerous hours in working on people’s photos over the past few weeks; so many in fact, that other areas in my life have suffered greatly as a consequence (sleep mostly). So as a brilliant alternative in lieu taking another half-hour (or longer) of my much-needed rest, I thought I’d post a few items worth a few thousand…













And these are only a few of them...

Goodnight bloggers.

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Interview

Pin It I hate being “tagged” and then having to do stuff like this…therefore, I have decided to alter this tagging to the following. I have chosen to be interviewed by singer/songwriter, John Ondrasik of Five for Fighting.

Mr. Zimmerman and Ondrasik sat in the studio in comfortable high-backed chairs chatting about a large variety of topics. The following are transcripts from their interview.

John: So, Jason. Tell me a little about yourself.

Jason: Well, what is it that you want to know?

John: How about a few things that most people may not know about you?

Jason: Well, for starters, I can juggle butcher knives.

John: You’re kidding! How did you manage to do that?

Jason: Actually, I learned while living in Missouri. I could juggle balls, but when I had a few roommates who could juggle, I started to pick up a few new tricks.

John: That’s amazing. Have you ever cut yourself?

Jason: (small laugh) More times than I’d like to admit.

John: So what would you say is one of the most “outgoing” or “amazing” moments you’ve had in your life?

Jason: Hmmm. Well, I’d have to say the time I met Howard Jones ranks up there as being something kind of gutsy.

John: Tell me about it.

Jason: Well, all during the concert Howard had made comments about people getting up to dance if they wanted, and nobody would do it. Finally, I turned to my friend, Mary Ellen, and said, “He really wants people to get up and dance…let’s go.” She admitted that she didn’t know the songs he was playing as they were from his new album…but she ended up going up with me.

John: What happened?

Jason: (laughing) I turned to the audience once I got up front and started to clap my hands over my head with the music and shouted, “C’mon everybody!”

John: How did they react?

Jason: Well, they just sat there and did nothing. To tell you the truth, it was a pretty lame audience up to this point.

John: Did you stay up there, in front?

Jason: Yeah. My friend and I started dancing and my sister and her husband came up to the front too…we were a group of four.

John: Was it that way for the whole concert?

Jason: No, it only took a couple of more songs and people started to trickle up to the front. Before long, there was a big crowd all up there dancing along with us. Howard even started to play some of his well-known songs from the beginning of the concert which he’d already played. Nobody seemed to mind though.

John: Well, that is a fun experience!

Jason: Oh, there’s more to it than that. You see, we’d stopped off before the concert and bought lighters. We were the only four people there with them either. I was so surprised…we lit them up on his song, “Hide and Seek.”

John: Now, you said earlier that you actually met Howard Jones?

Jason: Yeah. You see, we were…well, what’s the word? I guess you could say we were pretty “into it” at the concert, and once it had ended this lady came through the crowd and introduced herself as Howard’s tour manager. She asked us to stay after the show because Howard wanted to meet us.

John: He wanted to meet you?

Jason: Yeah, his tour manager said, “Howard wants you to stay after because he’d like to talk to you. He said that you must be his biggest fans in Spokane, Washington.”

John: So, did you stay?

Jason: Yes, we did. We waited around and he finally came out. We lit up our lighters so he would know who we were. He remembered. He came up to us and thanked us for making the show so memorable. I was totally blown away. He was a really nice guy, he even gave us his address and said we could write if we wanted to.

John: Did you ever?

Jason: Well, I was pretty young and didn’t really ever follow through, but I did think about it a few times. We did get a photo taken with him.

John: Ah, the jeans jacket.

Jason: (nervous smile) Yeah, I’m not too proud of the fact that I once wore that, or that awful hairstyle, but you know, it was the 90’s.

John: Indeed it was. Now, you mentioned earlier that you’ve been on the radio before? What happened to bring that about?

Jason: I was working at ComedySportz when this guy heard me doing my announcing. He liked my voice and asked if I’d record a couple of radio spots for his company.

John: What was the name of the company?

Jason: Inspecials. Yeah, I’d never heard of it either. We ended up recording five commercials which played on the radio during the summer of 2001.

John: I’ll bet that was fun.

Jason: Yeah, it was…I’d never been in a recording studio before, and there were several times we had to keep recording the commercial segments over and over again because we’d make a mistake. It was a lot of fun though.

John: So, have you always been interested in radio?

Jason: I have. I thought about being a radio announcer before, or maybe a movie director.

John: But not a teacher?

Jason: No, actually, that was the last thing I wanted to do…well, maybe not the last, but it wasn’t something I’d put much thought into.

John: What other professions did you consider?

Jason: Well, I wanted to be an actor. But when I got a bit older I decided I wanted to be an author.

John: Have you ever written anything?

Jason: Well, I blog.

John: (laughing) I’ve been there a few times. You’ve got a quote of mine on your header.

Jason: What can I say? You have a way with words.

John: Thanks. I noticed you had a few posts awhile back about experiences in your childhood. They’re pretty funny.

Jason: The past is always more funny once it becomes the past. While it was the present, all of those experiences were pretty awful, to tell you the truth.

John: Have you ever thought about writing a book about them?

Jason: Yeah. I’ve actually got a lot of other experiences I need to write about before I die. Some of them are funny, like the time Kenny Monzingo was in the outhouse and…well, I’ll just have to finish that one first.

John: You seem to have a good memory for things in your past.

Jason: Well, some of those times were a lot more memorable than others, you know? Some made a greater impact. I mean, I couldn’t tell you what I had for breakfast most mornings, but I can remember some of the “headline events.”

John: Have you ever written anything else?

Jason: Yeah. I’ve got a lot of unfinished stories…I do have a few which are done…or near enough anyhow. I’ve been stuck on my most current book for a few years.

John: What’s keeping you stuck?

Jason: Mostly the fact that I am lazy. I just don’t set aside the time I should to work on it.

John: Why not?

Jason: Lack of motivation I guess. But when I go to a bookstore and see some of the lame stories they have for sale, I know that what I’ve written would do better than some of that junk.

(director, off-camera): Two minutes remaining.

John: Well, we only have another minute or so of time left…I wanted to ask you a question about your cookie recipe.

Jason: Chunk-A-Poos?

John: Where in the world did that name come from?

Jason: Actually, they were named by a boy I used to mentor by the name of Alejandro.

John: Why did he name them what he did?

Jason: Well, actually, we were coming up with gross names for ice cream. We’d come up with stuff like catsup, liver, snot, and a bunch of other interesting flavors when Alejandro belted out, “CHUNK-A-POO!” I guess it just stuck.

John: But why a name like that for something as good as those cookies?

Jason: Probably because the middle of the cookie has a Rolo in it…in a sense that IS the “chunk” in the middle.

John: Do people ever question you about it?

Jason: Yeah, they say they are going to call them something else, but the name always seems to stick. It’s funny, my friend, Karen, and I will talk about them and how we “need some Poo.” I always wonder what other people would say if they overheard our conversation and that particular line.

John: Probably would be pretty grossed-out.

Jason: Probably. But I guess one of the perks about creating something is the fact that you get to name it.

John: (laughing) I guess it would be. Now, before our time is up, is there anything else you’d like to share?

Jason: Well, I actually wanted to thank you, really. I also wanted to let you know that I really enjoy your music.

John: Thanks. Any song in particular you like?

Jason: I’d have to say that “The Riddle” is my favorite right now.

John: That’s a good one.

Jason: I love the message you share with it. That’s why I picked a part of the song for my header…I just love the lines: “There are secrets that we still have left to find. There have been mysteries from the beginning of time. There are answers we're not wise enough to see…”

John: There are still some mysteries out there…some of those mysteries are still about you, Jason.

Jason: I think we all need a little mystery in our lives, it’s what keeps us interesting.

John: Well said. (looking at watch) And that’s all the time we have today. Join us next week with an interview on another blog. Thanks for coming in today, Jason.

Jason: My pleasure, it was good meeting you.

John: And you too.


End of program.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Rumors

Pin It “I hate to spread rumors, but what else can one do with them?”
- Amanda Lear

Aren’t rumors a terrible thing? They’ve been around for centuries, and have nearly always either ruined lives or been the means of spreading partial-truths, oftentimes doing no good whatsoever. In fact, I can remember hearing a rumor when I was a growing up about a friend of mine…this vicious rumor, passed around like a soccer ball in a championship game, was soon spread throughout the entire school, nearly everybody thinking that it were true. Well, in a nutshell, the rumor was NOT true, however, it was already too late and the damage was done. Unfortunately for my friend, there was nothing he could do to change the popular belief now shared amongst much of the student body.

There was a rumor today at work…

You can imagine the feeling of surprise I had when one of my students asked: “Mr. Z, is it really true that you aren’t going to teach anymore after this school year is over?”

“What?” I responded, taken aback somewhat.

“I heard that you decided to quit because the kids at this school don’t turn in their homework.”

I gazed at this boy. “Really?” I said, with the vaguest hint of a smile. “I hate to break the bad news to you, but I plan on being a teacher next year.”

He paused as I called my reading group to the front of the room.

“Mr. Z?”

“Yes?”

“Is it true that you are leaving SSV because you hate it here?”

Whoa…just what was going on here? There is usually one rumor each year that I am leaving SSV, however, this was the first time I’d heard this little version.

“Who’d you hear this from?” I asked.

“From Joey.”

“Ah, I see…” I scanned the room, and Joey just happened to be nearby. “Joey, may I have a word please?”

Joey ambled to the front of the room as I quietly asked, “Where’d you hear the rumor that I hate my job?”

Joey began to list a string of names from whence his information sprang. Unfortunately, I cannot remember all of the names as the complexity of the line of individuals involved were much too long and detailed to be logged into the short-term memory by any stretch of the imagination. However, I believe that it went something like this;

“Well, I heard it from Mark when we were playing soccer at recess. One of the girls, Lisa, was telling her friends about it. She said she heard it from her older brother who’d heard it from his friend in at the high school. The friend’s dad was a co-worker on a movie set with Harrison Ford and they were discussing it during a coffee break. I guess Mr. Ford had been talking to his director, Steven (Speilberg), between takes and he said he’d heard it from his wife’s sister who knows this lady with a psychic hotline. She’d received the information while in a trance—I guess she was channeling the transmigrating soul of John Denver…it was him who first knew about it.”

Well, you can imagine my surprise at just how many individuals were keeping up with Lifestyles of Z, and were making it a point to discuss the various and sundry details of my life. I was further surprised when, with a little digging, I soon discovered that there were four other versions of said story which involved everything from being terminated by the district for giving action slips to students for gum chewing, to quitting because of lazy kids who wouldn’t complete their homework.

This is a rumor-filled society and if people want to sit around and talk about whom I’ve dated, then I’d say they have a lot of spare time and should consider other topics...
- Johnny Depp

I set him straight. In fact, I set my whole class straight.

However, as I left school I found myself wondering just why rumors have a tendency to come into existence, and, more often than not, why they are always so cataclysmically overblown? Just what is it about rumors that get us excited to spread the news to others? Of course, if I’m being honest with myself, I’ve taken part in my fair share of rumormongering from time to time.

But it feels different when the rumors are about you.

Well, it’s kind of cool, really. After all…if there are rumors about you, then you are worthy topic of discussion to the masses, and are therefore interesting conversation. I guess there is something to say about that, and it could be worn as a badge of honor. However, it can be quite disconcerting when one finds out just how many diverging versions of the truth are really out there. Just where do all of these different adaptations come from? What is it that motivates a person to spread a fairy-tale with a mixture of truth as being unequivocated gospel fact, when said information has not been accurately checked back at the source?

I guess it’s probably because the truth is not nearly as fun, interesting, or juicy as what one is able to spread with the aid of cell phones, text messaging, and backyard neighborhood fences.

To quell the rumor and set it all straight: I AM transferring schools. I will be teaching 5th grade next year. I am doing this because the reasons I had for staying at my present school are no longer there. I have never kept it a secret that I would stay at SSV only so long as Mrs. Wright, Mr. Firmage, Mrs. Bliss, and Expedition Red Rock were still there too. They are all now notably absent, therefore, so shall I be.

On a final note…it was Alyson Hannigan, the actress from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, once said, “There was a rumor that I was dead. I happened to be off work that day and I had a beeper and the batteries had died so I was just shopping and looking round bookstores. People were frantically trying to get in touch with me, and people were calling hospitals and the news people were calling my agent trying to see if it was true, and I got home and my voice mail was filled with people going, ‘Call me if you’re ok’ - and I was completely oblivious.”

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

What to do, what to do…

Pin It As I was readying myself to compose a blog this evening complete with tales of adventure and intrigue, I decided first to check my email. As usual, there are the various and sundry forwarded items which, at best, get a quick glance before being dumped into the “trash” bin, the letters from friends letting me know that Saturday just won’t work out for them, but they hope the event is a success nonetheless, and emails from a student or two begging for more time for their literature responses.

As I was answering these varied emails, I noticed that I had one from Chase.” Perhaps you remember this boy…he was the student who threw down the gauntlet over a month ago and challenged me to wear a button-up shirt and tie each day at school. Well, he sent me an email with the subject line of: shirt and tie.

The email read thus:

Mr. Z,

It's your dream come true. It's Christmas, only the presents are all yours. I, “Chase,” am calling off the bet. Well really my parents made me stop, but all the same DON'T WEAR A SUIT OR TIE.

As I read over this email I have to admit, I felt two contrasting emotions at the same time. One emotion, relief, was cheering at the top of it’s lungs at the prospect of not having to be stuffed into those uncomfortable clothes each and every day. The other emotion, disappointment, hung it’s head and patted me on the back, “Well, it’s over now.” It seemed to say. “When you walk into the classroom tomorrow you’ll be the only one dressed up from now on.”

I guess I didn’t realize just how accustomed I’d become to Chase dressing up each day. A part of me is really going to miss that. So now comes the question:

Do I stop wearing the tie each day, just because Chase will not be doing it any longer? OR should I keep on “dressing up” each day, despite the fact that the challenge has been rescinded? I find myself at a loss this evening, caught between professionalism and comfort. Which of these two paths would be the better to follow?

What to do, what to do?

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