SCENE 1, EXTERIOR. AFTERNOON, PLAYGROUND. Most of the class is playing on the playground equipment with the exception of one fifth-grade boy. The boy is following his teacher around as the teacher watches his students go down the slide, traverse the monkey bars, or attempt parkour. All the while, the boy is chatting incessantly. After several minutes of relentless talk, the teacher moves to the bench to sit down, the boy quickly slips under him and then starts to giggle.
TEACHER: What are you doing? Are you trying to be a chair?
[The boy continues to laugh as the teacher sits down next to him.]
JOEY: I want to do something.
TEACHER: So go do something.
JOEY: I want to play a game.
TEACHER: So go play a game.
JOEY: I want to play a game with you.
[The teacher looks at the boy, and then at the rest of the class playing on the equipment before answering in a quiet voice.]
TEACHER: There’s only one game I know how to play...and it’s awesome.
JOEY: [Breathlessly] Really? What game is that?
TEACHER: The game’s called...‘Be Mean to Joey.”
[The boy looks a trifle concerned.]
JOEY: How do you play it?
[The teacher looks around and notices the wood chips on the playground.]
TEACHER: Well, first you find a boy named Joey, and then fill his underwear with wood chips. After that you roll him around all over the ground…it’s pretty fun.
[There is a pause as the boy looks at his teacher.]
JOEY: But I don’t wear underwear, Mr. Z.
TEACHER: That’s a little bit too much information there, Joey…going commando.
JOEY: No, I wear boxers.
TEACHER: Oh, so you’re a fighter?
[The boy bursts out laughing.]
JOEY: So, can we play a game?
[Fade to black.]