Moments with Joey – Twisted Ankles, Chainsaws, and Homework (Oh, my)

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SCENE 1, INTERIOR. AFTERNOON, HALLWAY. The students have just come into the school from recess, and they are taking a 3-minute break. As they all make their way down the hallway, the teacher turns to walk to the office to deliver a message. He notices a boy who’s just limped up to him with a grimace on his face.

JOEY: Mr. Z?

TEACHER: What’s up, Joey?

[The boy limps a step toward the teacher and screws up his face in pain].

JOEY: I was playing ball outside and I hurt my ankle.

TEACHER: How bad do you think it is?

JOEY: Pretty bad [grimace]. I was wondering if I could go to the office.

[The teacher looks at the boy for a few moments and then grins].

TEACHER: Why go to the office? I could take care of the problem right here; you know that I have scissors in the classroom…

[The boy glances down at his ankle and then looks back at his teacher].

JOEY: Scissors won’t cut through the bone. I think I’d need a chainsaw. That’s why I have to go to the office.

TEACHER: [Trying to mask a smile]. The office has a chainsaw?

JOEY: Yeah, to take care of the hurt kids. I’ve seen ‘em using it before.”

TEACHER: Well, I’m heading to the office right now; why don’t you come along?

SCENE 2, INTERIOR. AFTERNOON, OFFICE. The boy walks into the office next to the teacher with only an occasional limp. As the secretary hangs up the phone and looks up at them, the boy’s expression contorts into one of immense pain.

SECRETARY: What can I do for you, Mr. Z?

TEACHER: Well, Joey here says he hurt his ankle and needs some first aid. He also told me that you guys have a chainsaw to take care of student injuries. I told him I could just use scissors, but he was adamant that the chainsaw would work better.

SECRETARY: [playing along]. As a matter of fact, we do have a chainsaw. I keep it right here under my desk.

[The secretary points to the cupboard space beneath her laptop. Another teacher passing passing through the office pauses after overhearing the conversation].

PASSING TEACHER: You’d better put a tarp on the floor if you use the chainsaw or you’ll stain the carpet.

[The boy looks expectantly at the secretary who then shakes her head].

SECRETARY: Oh, you know what? We can’t use the chainsaw today…it doesn’t start very easily. I don’t think we’d be able to get it running.

[The boy and his teacher look at each other].

TEACHER: Well, what're we going to do now, Joey?

[The boy acts like he’s thinking deeply for a few moments].

JOEY: Maybe we could just get some ice instead.

TEACHER: I guess that would be a better idea wouldn’t it?

SECRETARY: Joey, I’m sorry but the ice machine is broken, remember? I told you that the other day when you came in for ice. [pause] But I’ll bet we could get you a towel soaked in cold water.

JOEY: [Disappointed]. Oh.

TEACHER: Tell you what, Joey. I’ll check my heart and see if I’ve got any ice left in there.

JOEY: But it would be black; it’d probably kill me if I used it.

[The teacher pauses, in thought].

TEACHER: Well, look at the bright side, if you died, then I could have all your stuff.

JOEY: I’ll tell you what, Mr. Z. If I die, you can have everything in my desk, including my homework.

SCENE 3 INTERIOR. AFTERNOON, CLASSROOM. The teacher is doing a comprehension activity with the class; the students are scanning a text and writing connections they've made. The door opens and the boy walks in, he is not limping at all at first, but when the teacher looks at him, the boy starts a slow, laborious movement across the room to his desk. He sits and looks at the worksheet awaiting him. He then sneaks a peek in his desk. His expression falls. He raises his hand and waits for the teacher. The teacher walks to his desk.

JOEY: [Whispered]. Mr. Z, you didn’t do my homework.

TEACHER: [Whispered]. Well, you didn’t die either now, did you?

[Pause]

JOEY: [Whispered]. No, I guess I didn’t…bummer.

Fade to black.