Saturday, January 10, 2009

Guest Blogger - Jayne

Pin It I’ve been thinking about doing this for a long time.

It started off as a little idea in the back of my mind, which I finally started to implement today.

But is that not always the way of great ideas? They start off as something we mull around for an unforeseen time period—often we tend to completely forget about for awhile, before something reminds us of it again? Then, we will often become excited and see it all as newness, and wonder why we hadn’t initiated it before now.

Awhile ago I thought of occasionally inviting others to submit posts for Adventures and Misadventures of Daily Living. A ‘guest blogger’ (so to speak) of the proverbial day. It is with this idea that I asked my friend, Jayne, to submit something she wanted to talk about—and an image if desired—which she graciously agreed to do. So, it is without further ado that I introduce you to Jayne of the Moon.

I hope you enjoy her post; I know that I did.

Dear January,

Enough already—we get it! We are losers living lives of terrible misery. You’ve made your point January; you’ve made your point.

You’ve been less than subtle in letting us know we’re a little chubbier than we should be, what with all the ads trumpeting “Half off Slim Fast products”. “A New You!” you proclaim, as you push gym memberships and energy bars our way. We get it January, we’re fat.

“Get Organized!” you shout, from the covers of magazines that stare us down while we wait in the checkout line with our diet pills and Cliff Bars, “Get Organized!” We dutifully box our Christmas decorations away, as if to the grave, only to be left with empty shelves and fireplace mantles begging to be noticed. You leave us with nothing to decorate for, nothing to celebrate. Making paper-chains to count down to Martin Luther King Jr. Day doesn’t pack the same punch we always hope it might.

December encouraged us to eat, drink and be merry, which we did—enjoying social events with family, friends and co-workers. Now you mock us, January, laughing at our empty pockets and bulging hips. “Ha ha ha!” You taunt, as you send us sliding off the roads and into brown snowbanks, “Winter has only just begun!”

You win, January, you win. We are never such failures as we are when we are in your terrible grasp—year after deplorable year.

Now, please, we beg you January, leave us soon.

Counting down the days (paper chain and all),

We Hate January Inc.


Kris said...

So the school district is doing a battle of fitness. Elementary vs. elementary. So we had to all join up. Maybe they should just get rid of January and go right to February?

Lydia said...

Jayne seems like a very good writer but a little "glass is half emty".

K.J. said...

Nice story!
January never seems to make you feel skinny!
I'm just waiting for spring to bring on the warmth, so we can walk off these extra pounds!

mywest said...

Hey, Mom loves winter...and the beauty of freshly fallen snow, but she isn't outside shoveling snow. Sometimes all I want to do is escape to the desert and enjoy a sunrise or sunset with all the beauty that goes unseen by most.

Anonymous said...

Oh boy Jayne. You and your subjects that stir everything up! I tell ya if it were up to me we should just skip February too and get straight to my birthday in March!!!


Gerb said...

Love it.

Teachinfourth said...

Kris - I wholeheartedly agree with you on that one...that, or let's put a really fun holiday in January.

Christmas II?

Lydia - Actually, she's totally a 'half full' person. You'd love her...

Jen said...


Lola said...

Lydia-that is a petty comment. It's a story-a writer does that-doesn't mean she's petty. She's funny-i'm sure you get that:):):

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